I had woken up, emailed the photographer some picture ideas, packed some things in the car, and headed to Starbucks with some of the greatest friends in the world. After filling my body with much-needed caffeine (or nerve suppressant), I was on my way to get my hair done. I can remember every detail of the day as if I'm actually there preparing to end my life as a single and embark on something that seemed, on many occasions, like it would never arrive.
My wedding. My marriage.
There are those events in life when you wait so long for it to come, and then when it does, all your anticipation, anxiety, and excitement seem like they are all meshed together like a pot of stew. When the three emotions collide, your heart is just not certain that it can take it. Then you think, sadly, that all this waiting and emotion-building will end when the day, night, hour, or week is over. Only on this day though, there would be no end. I would spend the whole day celebrating, but I would spend the rest of my life learning how to live joined as one with someone else.
Now, three years later, I feel like I have learned so much about this man and about this marriage, but I feel like I am so far away from having it figured out. It's like when you're running and you feel like you accomplished so much when you see a mile pass, but when your goal is three miles or five miles or thirteen miles, you realize that a mile seems like so little. So you just keep running. Even in the moments when it seems like a lot of trouble to keep pushing on with your exploding lungs and aching legs, you remember what your goal is so you persevere.
And three years ago this man that I married, who I was certain that I loved more than I ever could love anyone, has transformed my idea of love with the help of a Savior. No longer is it love that exists solely on giddy feelings, though those feelings do come around, and no longer is it love based on everything that I need, though that selfishness still very much exists. But ultimately, it's love based on a choice that in spite of anything that happens, he's the one that I love. And I love him so.
Cameron,
Year one was fun, new, and exciting. Year two was challenging, adventurous, and change-filled. Year three has been calmer and more hectic all at the same time, but full of lessons that are worth more than gold. I love you more today than I ever have, and if for no other reason, it's because of the man that I have seen the Lord grow you to be. Thank you for loving me in spite of days of complete selfishness and incredible sinfulness. Down three and forever to go!
Fun facts for three years of marriage:
- We've had four (and hopefully five soon) addresses.
- Together we've had five job changes.
- We haven't broken any of our dishes.
- We've had to replace many wedding gifts and still have more to replace thanks to Uhaul's stellar storage facilities.
- We've almost bought three houses.
- We've been to seven youth camps and four disciple nows.
- We've had a leased car and an almost fully purchased car. And then there's the mustang.
- We've realized how completely stubborn and hard headed we both are.
- We've prayed about adoption on a serious level.
- We've prayed about a million things on a serious level.
- We've gained and lost some friends.
- We've become friends of Dave Ramsey who turned our financial world upside down.
- We've lived with family for ten months and loved every second of it.
- We've developed a love-hate relationship with apartments.
- We've lived and flourished without cable TV despite the odds.
- We've annoyed each other a whole lot and loved each other a whole lot.
- We've learned to love Jesus a whole lot because of His grace in our marriage.
Happy Anniversary, my love!
4 Comments:
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Wednesday, July 15, 2009 1:42:00 PM
Congratulations!!Friday, July 17, 2009 9:00:00 PMI'm pretty sure that "family" loved every second of it too, especially the youngest member!!Sunday, July 19, 2009 9:16:00 PMHannah! I had no idea you had a blog! How fun! Happy Anniversary! Love, AnnaMonday, July 20, 2009 11:37:00 AMHappy Anniversary...sorry I'm late, but what a sweet tribute to you and Cameron. CONGRATULATIONS!!!!! LOVE YOU BOTH MUCH!
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